Practicing Emotional Intelligence for Abundance
Have you ever felt like you were facing a problem, but you didn't know how to define it?
Here's a simple thought exercise in emotional intelligence to help you get a better understanding of how to wrap your mind around the world we live in and the common problems we face. Learn how you can take definitive steps to get in touch with your intuition for accelerated learning so that you can get what you desire.
Let's start with a story:
A farmer once had a horse, and one day that horse ran away. The farmer's neighbor said, "What a bummer! Your horse ran away." The farmer said, "Maybe."
The next day, the horse came back to the farmer and it brought another horse with it. The farmer's neighbor said, "That's amazing! Your horse came back and brought you another horse!" The farmer said, "Maybe."
The next day the farmer's son was riding the new horse, and he fell off and broke his leg. The farmer's neighbor said, "What a bummer! Your son fell off that new horse and broke his leg." The farmer said, "Maybe."
The next day the military came to town and demanded a draft of all young men, and since the son had a broken leg, he was excused from service. The farmer's neighbor said, "Lucky you! Your son does not have to risk his life in battle." The farmer said, "Maybe."
The goal of the exercise is to leave you feeling a calm sense of vision and direction, and show you how you can process and then let go of your thoughts, regardless of your thoughts' negative or positive vibrational charges.
It's an active way of practicing yin and yang. You do not have to be as stoic as the farmer in the story, in fact it helps to appreciate the dynamic nature of your emotions.
This is an intermediate exercise in that it helps to already have a meditation practice in order to appreciate some of the subtle nuance of the exercise.
Part 1: The Source of Emotions
Let's assume emotions and thoughts have a source, we can call it the consciousness that flows through you. NOTE: From meditation, you may feel an unflinching determination to observe your own (and probably others') habitual patterns of behavior and emotion - and feel a drive to understand the cause of these patterns to do away with them when you notice them occurring. And at some point you may also notice it helps to leg go of feeling bad "guilty, shameful" or good "proud, righteous" about it - because these good/bad “after-feelings” are also patterns.
Part 2: The State of Having and Appreciating
Let's say you live in the modern Westernized consumer world and you have a “normal” consumption tendency. You exchange time, money and energy for things that you need and enjoy, and you take care to support a kind and just socioeconomic system - for example by buying organic produce, supporting local businesses, recycling, biking and walking when possible and contributing to your community, you are a conscious consumer. We can also observe that the consumption habit can become a compulsive, destructive greedy/hoarding tendency. You can consume knowledge, food, psychedelics, experiences, friends, money, but rather than fully appreciating it all, you do it just to get, have or achieve things. (I believe these things are inherently valuable, and they can be supportive of your life, it’s how you interact with it.) Having and appreciating them are two sides of the same coin, and we'll see it's mostly about building a resilient mindset.
Part 3: Facing Underlying Fears and Thought Patterns
Why do we consume? It’s nature to get things and as social animals we have needs beyond survival, but if it’s a problem, it’s usually a thought pattern. You feel an emotion like fear, which translates to a subconscious (you’re usually not fully aware of it when it’s happening) thought pattern which says “I am afraid, I am not good enough, I don’t have enough, so I need to get more, and if I don’t get more, it will hurt and if it hurts, I will get angry or sad, and if I do nothing about those emotions, I will get depressed and if I get depressed, then I have to completely change my life to keep moving on, and if I have to completely change my life, it’s going to be a lot of work and I’m already busy and tired, and besides what will my friends think if I don’t get that shiny new thing?” You know about society and how advertisers get you to buy stuff you don’t need like that toothbrush that sings you a song (You may think: "That’s useful, that’s how I know how long to brush my teeth." But do you need it? You see how we can get wrapped up in nonsense.
This emotional pattern then translates to “I think I need something outside of myself, but I really feel I need to change myself and I don’t know how to do that.” That “something outside yourself” is actually a feeling of acceptance and appreciation of life and what you already are and have - but in the moment, you can get too caught up in the chase of getting things, valuable things, to stop and smell the roses.
Part 4: Shifting Your Vibrational State from Getting to Giving
How do you change your mindset to stop grabbing at the transcendental experience of “having” something (of the feeling of connection, of knowing, of the rush of power that is never fully satisfied by more) and just BE with your you-ness? (You are going to be all by yourself when you die, even if you are surrounded by loved ones, and then who knows.) I can’t answer that question for you - because you are the expert of you, I am the expert of me. The more you are with your you-ness, the more you know yourself, the more you offer the world. Generosity is our natural state, and it blossoms from your ability to be able to understand your light and your shadows.
Hippie new age-y inspiration verified by the laws of physics: The more light you shine, the more your shadows disappear.
Part 5: "Thank for Yourself"
Simple things that you can try are stopping what you’re doing, taking a break, going outside, sitting under a tree, breathing deep until you feel relaxed. Take part in the mind-blowing fact that we exist and that you have no idea how most of what’s happening is happening. Rather than turning to the nearest book to "figure it out" - because while books are good, they are not your insight, they are someone else’s. It helps to be original here, so you’re going to have to think for yourself to get the full effect! You just bask in the blazing glory of the sunshine or starlight and say thank you to universal intelligence, God, Allah, Jesus and the ascended masters, aliens, your parents, your pet cactus, but MOST OF ALL THANK YOURSELF with all your heart until you feel better preferably light as a feather. Then you’re the Buddha! Just kidding, but you’re not Buddha, unless we’re all Buddha, does the Buddha exist? Does anything exist?
Listen to a 30-minute audio version of the Buddha’s Diamond Sutra, one of the most important teachings according to the Buddha himself, other than the simple teaching "be kind."
So, here’s same question as the beginning, where do the thoughts come from and why are they here? I am not qualified to answer that question. I can tell you that on a practical level it’s worth it to observe your thoughts and become more aware of what’s going on up there all the time while you’re living life. some tools you can put to use are meditation, journaling and asking for help.
More fun questions for you to ponder:
What are thoughts? Are thoughts really interdimensional energy waves transformed into electrical impulses generated by your nervous system and channeled from your spine through your heart into your brain and out of your body like little cartoon thought bubbles? If so, how do we just chill out and enjoy the ride?
Thank you for reading and until next time, keep vibing with the universe.
About Peter Fettis
As a Registered Yoga Teacher and and Certified Personal Trainer, Peter practices optimizing human potential as a way of life. His latest book How to Eat Well and Love Yourself dives into the practical principles of mindfulness and plant-based nutrition to give you a taste of the abundant harvest from the mind's inner garden of awareness. Peter’s vision with FlowPrana is to make waves in the current culture by rallying the wider public to recognize their inner healing power using a proactive, gentle approach.